Child Section
Mediation is a process which your mums and dads can use when they want to be sensible about separating. It allows them to put the family first and make arrangements which you all can live with when deciding how to share time with you and any money and property. Most importantly it is also a chance for them to remember that you are the child of both of them and to think about how to look after you and keep loving you after the separation. It works using another person called a “Mediator” to make it easier to talk about hard things.
These are some things about you that may be talked about in mediation:
How to think about your needs and feelings
How to organise things so that you see both of your parents often.
How to organise summer holidays, Christmas, birthdays and other special occasions.
How to organise the rules in two different homes.
How your parents behave with each other.
How to share information about you.
How to organise your school activities – things like parents’ evenings, watching you perform or play sport, school trips and so on.
How to organise your activities outside of school – sport, hobbies, and more.
How to sort out who pays for what.
If you are a religious family, how to organise weekly worship and special religious events.
How to introduce new people your parents may meet.
How to organise things so that you still see your pets.
These are all important issues and the Mediator will help your parents agree to a plan to look after you.
Yes. If you want Kids+ mediation, you should tell your parents. They must both agree to this. Unfortunately, if one of them does not agree, the child inclusive mediator cannot meet with you.
Yes. If you want Kids+ mediation, you should tell your parents. They must both agree to this. Unfortunately, if one of them does not agree, the child inclusive mediator cannot meet with you.
If your parents agree, you can be involved in this discussion.
There is a special form of mediation called child inclusive mediation. We call it Kids +. A specially trained Kids+ mediator meets with you.
This process makes sure your voice is heard. You can tell the Kids+ mediator what you are really thinking and feeling. It’s important you don’t just say what you think your parents want to hear.
You will not be involved in things you cannot understand. Adults will sort those out. However sometimes you will have ideas for solutions that your parents cannot see. However, your parents are still responsible for making arrangements, not you. The mediator makes sure your parents understand this.
Normally, what you tell a child inclusive mediator is confidential – this means no-one else is told what you say to the Mediator unless you want that to happen. That means the mediator will not tell your parents anything you say unless you give permission. When your parents choose child inclusive mediation, they have to agree to this, and both have to sign a document to confirm it. Your parents also agree that they will not try to tell you what to say before mediation meetings, or question you during the mediation, or tell you off afterwards for anything you said.
There is one exception to confidentiality. If the mediator thinks someone is in danger, they must, by law, take action.